Compassion

"Compassion is the finest weapon and best defence.If you would establish harmony,Compassion must surround you like a fortress." (The Tao Te Ching v.68)

I recently watched the web casts of the Seeds of Compassion conference that was held in Washington State with special guest the Dalai Llama. (www.seedsofcompassion.org) The focus was on raising compassionate children and there was debate as to whether compassion was innate or learned. I am usually of the opinion that most emotions and behaviors are a combination of the nature/nurture theories.

I have never given much thought as to whether we are born compassionate, but I certainly believe that children 'learn' to be cruel. We have all suffered from being teased or bullied in the schoolyard, and most adults accept this as just "typical kids behaviors" and therefore rarely do anything to either protect their child, or teach them how to handle these situations without becoming too stressed out, or validate the child's hurt feelings. We tell them to ignore or "get over it".

In spite of horrendous incidents such as the Columbine shootings, we still fail to make nurturing compassion in our children a priority. So huge "kudos" to the Governor of Washington State for realizing the importance of this issue and hosting such an in-depth conference by bringing some of the greatest minds in the field of child development and psychology together for discussion.

The Dalai Llama, in his keynote address, stated that we needed more women in governing roles (no argument here) because women were more likely to find solutions through talking than fighting, and would be much less willing to send their children to war.

I have spent years dealing with my own pent-up rage that resulted from a compassion-less childhood. Today I am a supremely compassionate person working in a field of caring professionals, but finding the system within which I work one that does not care. Huge cutbacks in funding by the California State Governor have meant that the poorest of the poor will once again be denied the help and support that they need to become functioning members of society. Apparently there is no value in that to the State.

I have a neighbor who has friends in the professional baseball field and he tells me that young talents are often paid sign-up bonuses of $4 million. This must be what we value in our society. Please don't misunderstand me, I enjoy a good game of baseball but there has to be a balance in this world.

Compassion must begin at home - yes - with the children that we are raising if we want things to change for the better in the future, but in making such cutbacks to the already dis-enfranchised will engender despair and rage such as I felt as a child in a compassion-less home. From personal experience I can truly state that this a recipe for disaster.